Deathwank/Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair - Your Scene Means Fuck All

Deathwank/Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair
Your Scene Means Fuck All

Deathwank emerged from the grind cesspool last year as Scotland's answer to Anal Cunt. Their songs were so ridiculously titled you couldn't help but thinking they were perhaps aping them a little too closely, especially given that their songs struggled to even reach 30 seconds a time. Here, they play the title track, their only track, at precisely six minutes. It's here they prove they can be more than pure imitators. It could well be the case that this is several songs rolled into one track, given the high number of time changes, stick clicks and paces on show, all nailed in one take. Whatever, its fucking genius. It's insane. It's sounds like the bloated offspring of Melt Banana and The Afternoon Gentlemen, getting bounced from wall to wall, with only the briefest of respites before getting submerged back into its torture cell with no true means of escape. Put simply, this is one of the grind highlights of the year so far.

Conversely, Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair contribute tracks, and in comparison to last year'a fantastic 'Contraception', is altogether more concerned with brevity than concept. This despite an intro and outro track, both sounding suspiciously like a TV theme tune in structure  bookending their side of the split. It's rampant and chaotic, only truly letting up with a truly phlegm-wretching snarl during 'A Film That No One Ever Watches', the only post-minute track they post.

It's two very different approaches to grind, though the end product is still the same. If it were a boxing match, I'd perhaps hand it to Deathwank on this occasion, simply for breaking out of their micro-shackles in favour of a singular take rollercoaster of insanity. Still, 'Your Scene Means Fuck All' is ridiculously great stuff all the way through, and has left me greatly anticipating each band's next move, particularly the new Wheelchair x4 album, which promises a sexual concept. Nice.

Peter Clegg

Download Deathwank's side here
Download Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair's side here

Stream each side of 'Your Scene Means Fuck All' below:





Deathwank Bandcamp
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Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Bandcamp
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Have yourself a very merry Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas

Earlier this year, we reviewed Scotland's finest grind offenders, the impressively monikered Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair, who delivered an incredible record in the form of the conceptual grind romance piece 'Contraception'.

Now Facebook followers of the band may already be aware, but in case you aren't, its time to get acquainted, if our glowing review didn't persuade you already. Because the Wheelchair x4 boys are the gift that keeps on giving, as their 2008 debut, the festively cheerful 'Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas', is available as a free download, courtesy of Messrs Finnie and King! Featuring incredible Christmas carols such as 'Daytrip to Lapland New Forest' and 'Holly Berries are Poisonous', delivered through the production of a cheesegrater, as a free download its recommended for any grind/powerviolence fan looking for a twist on the genre.

This is old news to those of you in the know, but with the 25th fast approaching, this is well worth an early festive treat.

Download 'Christmas Christmas Christmas Christmas' here
The 'hymn sheet' can be found here!

Peter Clegg

Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair - Contraception

Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair
Contraception
Grindcore Karaoke

Agoraphobic Nosebleed frontman and Grindcore Karaoke head honcho J. Randall is a busy man, as his labels huge range of releases would dictate - see our previous review of surf grinders Wadge earlier this year - but amongst the cacophony of anarchy and tinny production, he's found a potential diamond here in Scotland's Wheelchair x4 - or Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair if you prefer.

Originally self-released, 'Contraception' has a theme of young romance running through it. Not your typical grind fare, but then neither was the Scots' previous release 'Bald and Dead', a concept EP about the life and death of reality star Jade Goody. Cripes. Nevertheless, there's some interesting ideas floating about here, the near dancable and anthemic opening to 'Treat Your Woman Right', with guitarist Stuart Finnie and drummer Bobbie King trading vocals, eventually hitting face melting grind territory; the Thin Lizzy-esque riff to 'Never Go Dutch', and the saxophone solo that skronks its way into 'Be My Valentine'. Never does it lose a sense of speed and aggression though, as they shred and blast their way through twelve tracks at a brisk pace and with brutal menace.

The theme of romance pervades throughout, against a heart of darkness that finally becomes apparent during the closer 'We All Need Someone' where Finnie screams 'we all need someone/whatever the cost'. The samples accompanying it suggest this is a tale of dangerous obsession. Nevertheless, unsettling as the album seems, despite the initial heartfelt intentions, 'Contraception' is another fantastic record in a cracking year for grind, and ultimately confirms Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair Wheelchair become another impressive string on Scotland's extreme metal bow.

Peter Clegg

Download 'Contraception' here (pay-what-you-like)

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